Wicker, But Make It Nollywood: Who Would We Cast?
What if Wicker were a Nollywood movie? From Uzor Arukwe as the raffia husband to Funke Akindele as the fisherwoman, here is our dream cast.
If you do not live under a rock, have a phone and watch Hollywood movies, you would have come across clips of a bulky man woven from raffia, the perfect husband material for a fisherwoman ridiculed by her community.
No, she was not ridiculed because of her husband. She was mocked long before he showed up, and the raffia man only made the village want what she had.
The Wicker 2026 movie, starring Olivia Colman and Alexander Skarsgård, has American social media going wild, and it reaches Nigerian cinemas on November 20.
So before you book your ticket, let’s play a little imagination game: what if Wicker was a Nollywood film, and who would we cast?
What Is the Wicker 2026 Movie About?
Wicker is a romantic fantasy comedy about a fisherwoman living on the edge of a seaside village. She is single, she smells of fish, and the villagers never let her forget it.
Tired of the teasing, she asks the local basket maker, played by Peter Dinklage, to weave her husband out of wicker.
The result is dashing, kind and attentive. He handles the chores, he is a devoted partner in the bedroom, and the village women cannot stop staring.
Jealousy soon follows, and the fisherwoman starts worrying that someone will take him from her. The film is based on the short story, The Wicker Husband.
Wicker Nollywood Version: How the Plot Would Play Out
Picture a riverine fishing community in the Ondo area, where the fisherwoman, let us call her Mama Fish, is 32, unmarried and the favourite topic at every naming ceremony.
Her aunties ask about marriage. The Cele pastor’s prophecy has failed twice. Out of options, she visits a native doctor in the village, who agrees to weave her husband out of raffia in exchange for a cow, two pure black cockerels, 50 smoked fish, and a bottle of schnapps.
The raffia husband steps out in a fresh agbada. He catches the eye of the villagers. He is seen cooking without being asked. He washes the plates and goes to the river to fetch water for the household, while all Mama Fish does is to catch fish, and retire to her house to her wicker husband.
In a Nigerian setting, that alone is more unbelievable than a man made of palm fibre. The village women start circling. One neighbour offers him a meal. Another asks if he has a brother.
The aunties decided she must have used juju, which, to be fair, she did.
Soon, a jealous rival spreads rumours that the raffia husband is cheating. The fisherwoman starts a background check, and the whole village gathers for a heated meeting under the mango tree.
Add a dramatic slap, a heart-felt monologue, and a village head who insists on settling the matter with kola nuts, and you have a Nollywood classic.
Wicker Nollywood Cast: Who Would Play Who?
Here is our dream line-up:
The Raffia Husband: Uzor Arukwe. He has the height, the broad frame and the calm charm to play a man who is perfect by design.
With his recent roles in movies with predominant romance themes, he would pull this off, even if it were a Yoruba setting. Imagine he even sprinkles some Igbo words in his dialogues, setting off the fire beneath the pot of jealousy from the village women.
The Fisherwoman: Funke Akindele. She can play the butt of the village joke and still make the audience root for her. Her comic timing would carry the early scenes, and her dramatic side would handle the jealousy and heartbreak that follow.
The Native Doctor: Osita Iheme. With Osita Iheme’s mischievous screen presence, there would be a sort of comedic relief brought to the weaving of a husband, caused by desperation and societal expectations. He even slips and adds Igbo language in the incantation. So, the wicker now largely understands Yoruba but sometimes spills Igbo.
The Jealous Neighbour: Chioma Akpotha. Nobody does side-eye, gossip and sudden concern for another woman’s marriage quite like her. She would steal every scene at the borehole.
The Village Head: Odunlade Adekola. Give him a staff, a cap and a long speech about tradition, and the village square scene is sorted.
Why Wicker Would Work as a Nollywood Movie
If you remove the raffia, Wicker is a story about loneliness, social pressure and the strange things people do to be seen as worthy of love.
That is familiar territory for Nigerian audiences. We grow up with questions about marriage, the comparison with mates and the belief that a woman without a husband is a problem to be solved. Nollywood has told these stories for decades.
The original film is also funny, bawdy and bold, qualities Nollywood has in abundance. All it needs is the right cast, a good soundtrack and a title like Oko Raffia.
Until then, catch Wicker in Nigerian cinemas from November 20, and tell us who you would cast.