Everybody wants to live the “soft life.”

Stress-free, no wahala, just enjoyment, fine apartment, latest phone, clean drip, new hair, good food, and vibes only, But behind all the smiles, a lot of young people are fighting silent battles with empty wallets.

The “soft life” that social media sells is turning into a “broke life” for too many young Africans, Because when your lifestyle costs more than your income, you’re not living soft, you’re living a stressed life.

Who are you trying to impress?

That Moment when Salary just entered, You become so joyous, You’ve already planned and said to yourself,

“First, I’ll move into a fine apartment. I can’t be living in that old one room again. I’m working now, abeg.”

After moving in, you realize Rent had finish half your salary. Then you buy new curtains, new bedspread, and maybe a little fridge because, well, “soft life.”

Then your friends call and says

“Guy, party this weekend, don’t dull o’’

You attend dressing fresh, called Bolt, and posted, “Soft life activated 🔥”. The next morning, you check your account and you whisper, “Wait…who did I offend?”

By week three, you’re calculating how to survive till next payday, Instant noodles become breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Some nights, it’s just cold water and vibes. Yet you keep posting, “Living my best life’’

Truth be told, many Young Africans are living for the camera and not living comfortably, when you start living just to impress, your soft life turns into a broke life because real enjoyment should not come with financial hangover.

The influencer trap, when showing off becomes a full-time job

Instagram and other social media platforms randomly shows you Someone is in Dubai, Another one is at Santorini, Someone else is showing off a car with a caption like “God did.”

You scroll, sigh, and start thinking, then You start forcing yourself to keep up, brunch every weekend, Uber everywhere, “new drip every Friday.” You start living like an influencer without the influencer money.

most of the “soft life” people see online are not even spending their own money, Some are brand ambassadors, Some have sponsors, Some took that picture three months ago and just posted it now.

Yet most Young Africans especially those with 9–5 salary, want to “belong.” They end up broke and anxious, trying to copy people who don’t even notice them.

It’s funny how we say “Fake it till you make it,” but it does not mean living beyond your means or lie to impress others it means carrying yourself with the belief that you can become what you are aiming for, but many people just fake being rich and never make it. You can’t fake your way out of debt. You can’t filter your way into savings.

At the end of the day, soft life should be earned, not acted, Because pretending to have money is more expensive than actually having it.

The real soft life, peace, contentment, and smart moves, it is not about popping bottles or posting trips. It’s about living peacefully, comfortably, and happily within your means, Soft life means sleeping without worrying about rent, It means having small savings for emergencies.

It means being able to say “no” without shame, You don’t have to go broke to prove you’re living well, Sometimes the richest people are those who don’t need to show anyone anything.

Live simply but neatly, You don’t need designer to look confident, Budget like a boss, Even 5% saved every month can grow over time, Enjoy smartly, It’s okay to go out, but plan first, Be content, Gratitude makes even small things feel big, Stop comparing, Everyone’s timing is different, Move at your own pace.

When you start finding joy in what you already have, you’ll realize your life is softer than you thought.

Chasing soft life, losing yourself, the identity problem

Many young Africans today are caught between reality and image, Seeeing thier age mate on TikTok driving big cars, living alone, and traveling abroad and suddenly feeling like a failure.

Some of those influencers had helpers, Some are even faking it, But because you want to belong, you lose yourself trying to look like them.

You start changing your accent, You start pretending online, You stop enjoying your real life because you’re always comparing it to someone else’s highlight reel.

There’s this Yoruba saying;

“A Kìí wo ago alàago șișè’’

(one should not carry out duties using someone else time piece)

This saying advises against comparing your life or progress to others, If you keep comparing yourself to others, It suggests that each person has thier own path and timeline amd trying to live by someone else’s clock is a futile and stressful endeavor.

Soft life is not meant to be competition, It’s supposed to be comfort, not comparison,You can’t copy someone’s life and expect your peace to remain intact.

Because at the end of the day, you might be chasing “soft life,” but what you’re really losing is your real life.

Building your own version of soft life,It’s not about quitting enjoyment, it’s about balancing it.

Soft life doesn’t mean you should suffer in silence, You can still look good, go out, and enjoy, But do it smartly, Let your enjoyment match your pocket, not your ego.

You should small savings that give you confidence, live in a space you can afford comfortably, Not owing five people at once, Say no” to plans that will wreck your budget, find happiness in small things, a home-cooked meal, peace, sleep, laughter.

Stop trying to “show” your soft life. Live it quietly,The loudest people online are often the most tired offline,The quiet ones? They’re the ones truly living well.

There’s a quote by Chuck Palahniuk that says, “We buy things we don’t need with money we don’t have to impress people we don’t like’’

At the end of the day, soft life but broke life is not the goal, We all deserve ease, rest, and enjoyment but we also need wisdom, The goal is not to look rich, The goal is to be peaceful, be stable, and be content.

Soft life without savings is hard life in disguise, Soft life built on pressure is stress with fine packaging, The real flex is peace of mind, financial freedom, and being able to rest without guilt.

So live smart, flex wisely, save steadily, and stop living for likes because the true “soft life” is when your heart, wallet, and mind are all at peace.