This cocktail spot in North Beach is always packed with dates, freshly dumped twenty-somethings, and big groups trailing behind someone in a birthday sash. You’re here to jumpstart an unhinged night out with fancy cocktails or because Vesuvio had approximately two square feet of available standing room. Strut around and let everyone witness that outfit you painstakingly curated before you sweat through it down the street at Tupelo—and scoop up any fellow chaos agents on your way out the door.

A $75 plain tee

Whether you're single or part of a blossoming polycule, anyone who’s sworn off dating apps should go to the Marina Safeway. Otherwise known as Dateway, this big-box grocery store has an inexplicably high number of relationship success stories and there’s nowhere better in the city for a cart-bumping meet-cute. Go look for a bottle of red on your way to your next party or show up encased in sweats on a frozen pizza mission. "The one" could have already spotted you from the cereal aisle.

A single AirPod to make it known you’re open to conversation

It’s always hard to get a table at this French wine bar in Jackson Square, mostly because it’s packed with couples (or very confident first dates) hell-bent on proving just how in love—and effortlessly cool—they are. Prepare for people holding hands under the glossy red ceiling and movie theater-style marquee, only breaking eye contact to clock other couples who might be jealous of them.

Straight-from-the-office backpacks and totes

Barebottle in Bernal Heights is a rare spot where parents can unwind without the stress of keeping an eye on their kids. Little ones run wild, making new friends with every dog they meet and feeding quarters into arcade games, and adults kick back with a hazy IPA at communal picnic tables. It’s the kind of place where, after a round or two, someone will inevitably find a way to work in “language immersion program” into the conversation, all while eyeing which food truck just pulled up outside (hopefully it's Smish Smash).

A go-bag with children's essentials

Lovely’s is a catch-all scene where you’ll run into a neighbor, someone you matched with two years ago, and your favorite Bi-Rite cashier, all before you’ve reached the back patio. That's because they all have a common affinity for the city's most talked-about smashburger and the natural wines that flow freely from Woods in the shared space. Scope out a firepit and before you know it, you’ll end up sharing a picnic table with someone who swears they've met you before. 

Salomon XT6s

This iconic Bernal Heights bar is always throwing events. Maybe it's a DJ-and-chef combo day party for moshing and noshing, queer mingling nights, and even group political discussions. Whether you’re here looking to flirt, two-step, or wear something you look good in, all you need to do is check El Rio’s event calendar. With an elevated stage right in the middle of their crowded patio, no matter which day you arrive, there's always an opportunity to make your presence known.

Anything from a Patagonia fleece to a cropped tank or a Party City wig

A red velvet rope outside a restaurant in SF is about as rare as bare shoulders in June. But you’ll find one at Meski. The two-story Afro-Latin and Ethiopian restaurant is part-owned by Draymond Green, and that’s one reason why this place requires that rope. The other is its daily late-night hours and club-like atmosphere with low-lighting and pulsing music. Most days, you’ll see people waiting for a seat outside in everything from sparkly dresses to Curry jerseys at this Lower Nob Hill spot. It's a jolt of energy to the city’s usual Oura-dictated curfew, so anyone rebellious enough can shun their early bedtime, sip on coffee-spiked cocktails, and pretend the city’s nightlife scene is always like this.

Sequins

This Mexican restaurant is West Portal's outlet for pent-up going-out energy, so even Mondays feel like Saturdays here. Sure, you’ll spot a few families trying to enjoy a quiet night, but a never-ending supply of frozen margaritas and the sounds of a packed dining room quickly squash any hopes of that. If you want some eyes on you, grab a table by the windows. Just be prepared to wait unless you’re lucky enough to get a reservation.

Phones for scrolling while you wait for a table

Little Original Joe’s is the more glamorous sister restaurant to Original Joe’s—and it’s the Marina’s most popular see-and-be-seen destination since the Union Street Equinox opened. Flaunt your flashiest outfit, and stake claim to the seats next to the huge windows, so that jealous passersby can peer in and wish they too were digging into parmesan-dusted zucchini fry towers. Or snag a negroni (complete with a LOJ-branded ice cube) at the bar and wait for someone to compliment your watch.

Espresso martinis

The people at this weekend-only Korean spot in the Excelsior may be seeking Korean fried chicken, but they’re also ready to hit the tiny dance floor and show off in front of the DJ booth at a moment's notice. Sure, technically, there isn’t always a human being standing behind that booth, but that doesn’t stop the Korner Store crowds from call-and-response singing to a recording and debuting newly invented dance moves to tables of strangers.

Non-slip shoes

The crowd at Starlite is a mix of locals on third dates and tourists whose hotel concierge told them this place has a nice view. And they’re not wrong. This spot perched on the 21st floor has all-glass walls, excellent (and expensive) drinks, and velvet couches built for lounging and appearing on your Instagram feed. The best part is that it’s mostly indoors, so when Karl decides to crash the party, you can continue to go live on whatever social media platform without skipping a beat.

Snakeskin baguette bags

At Che Fico in NoPa, walking into the dining room feels like you’re being announced at a step and repeat. Ascend a gigantic staircase just to reach the host stand, which leads into a massive dining room with rows of glowing chandeliers, exposed wood beams, and red leather banquettes shiny enough to check your reflection in. To put your good taste on full display for the secretly wealthy C-suiters and 25th birthday partiers who frequent this place, go for a pizza and the supplí with gooey fontina centers.

Platinum credit cards

At Chotto Matte, you’ll walk past a stone-faced DJ, neon signs ominously reading “Come as you are,” and couches made of denim all just to get to your table. The rooftop bar in Union Square is a magnet for anyone with a minimum of 10,000 followers, so plan to be a background actor in someone’s video. The Japanese-Peruvian food is fine at best, so come for drinks and, if all goes well, viral fame.

iPhone flash and contour

There are two distinct crowds at Movida: Those draped in their finest clothes looking for the best lighting and others wearing their good luck Giants attire, hoping a critical mass of prayers results in a win. Regardless, everyone's downing Persian-Mexican tacos with lamb koobideh before moving onto a big night out or down to Oracle Park. It’s the rare place in SF where glittery heels and a beat-up jersey can peacefully coexist, though we suspect the complimentary shots of tequila that often get passed around help maintain the harmony.

Ring lights

This old-school bar and restaurant in Cow Hollow is a constant revolving door of all-ages locals, from Pacific Heights mansion-dwellers to ex-Greek lifers who still unironically wear their letters. There’s indoor seating (along with food, which is definitely not the point here), but most people stick to the patio. It’s the best place in the area to drink espresso martinis in the sun, look hot, and let your small dog (with its own verified Instagram account) can freely sniff other small dogs.  

ZYNs

Also in Cow Hollow is Céleste, a wine bar bathed in sexy red lighting that could easily be the backdrop to a Euphoria cover shoot. It’s the perfect place to seductively sip on a glass of orange wine, get hyped up by a bartender, and confidently make eyes at an NYC transplant from across the room. It gets crowded on weekends, but that's just all the more opportunity to lock eyes with someone who's going to ghost you in a couple of weeks.

A slick back bun or a tech vest