It rained for an hour on Monday in Gurgaon. Not torrential rains, but a normal, steady shower. The result: my fancy society gate was under 2 ft of water. When I ventured out, DLF Cybercity, where head offices of MNCs are housed, was choc-a-bloc with cars treading water while avoiding potholes. A low-slung yellow Lamborghini was driving at 5 km/h, in a brave display of hope over experience.

This could well have been Waterworld - not to be mistaken with Seaworld. No orcas here. Just drenched, angry, sweaty citizens driving machines through filthy water. Fitting, given that the media have been reporting on a Disneyland-themed park being planned in Haryana. Manesar, no less.

Last week, Haryana CM Nayab Singh Saini said his government is in talks with Disney officials and has identified 500 acres in Manesar. He also said Gurgaon was the location because of its economic importance and infrastructure, and that the project will 'generate thousands of direct and indirect employment opportunities and bring major changes to the area. It will attract international tourists too'.

Gurgaon is indeed important, given that it is home to some of the world's largest companies, and most expensive real estate. We have condos with apartments priced at ₹35 cr each, and sport international names such as Belaire, Palm Springs, Malibu Heights, Nirvana Country. Saini also correct in saying that a Disney would generate employment and attract tourists. All this would make sense - if we weren't talking about Manesar and greater (or smaller) Haryana.

When I was 12, my father took us to Disney World in Orlando, Florida. Even back then 35 years ago, while Disney World was great fun, it was Orlando - sun-kissed, clean, wide roads, 24-hr electricity, great restaurants big and small, decent motels and massive hotels, and reliable public transport - that stood out, despite millions of tourists descending on the city every day.

I don't know if you've been to Manesar. Orlando it is not. Manesar's hotels look like bordellos. Forget Manesar. Even prime pockets of Gurgaon have unending streets with no streetlights. That's assuming you even notice lack of streetlights in the many hours when there's no electricity supply in the city. To say Haryana and NCR do not have the best infrastructure is an understatement.

But maybe the whole point of having Disneyland in Manesar is that it's going to be far more, um, immersive. In fact, it won't need to build any rides or experiences. Who needs Magic Mountain when you can follow your nose upon entering Manesar - till you face 4,000 MT of untreated waste lying unprocessed at the Sector 6 dumping site, fondly referred to as 'Manesar Hill Site'.

Since July 2023, the Manesar civic body has been unable to secure a private entity for waste management. Mountains of trash haven't been treated for the last two years. Instead of the Big Thunder Mountain Railroad Ride, we can certainly have the Big Trash Mountain Ride.

Don't like stinky mountain rollercoasters? Fret not. Maybe Disneyland will just put everyone in dinky cars and tell them to drive through the streets of Haryana. Instead of Peter Pan's Flight - a rail-suspended dark ride over London - visitors can be asked to drive through Manesar and Gurgaon's unlit streets.

The potential for a reality-based amusement park is endless. Given that every day in Haryana is a rollercoaster ride. You're dodging manic drivers, people trying to mug you, potholes, angry passersby. If ever there was a real-life Jungle Cruise, this is it.

We still don't know whether Disney is aware of their supposed plan to enter Haryana. Or whether the bill to hand over the land for a Disneyland-style park has been passed. But these are small quibbles for a world where Dreams Come True - if not in the Happiest Place on Earth, at least in the Scariest Place in NCR.