One of the most quotable lines in FromSoftware’s hit video game Elden Ring is a line of of the early bosses says to you, foul Tarnished, during a fight. “Put these foolish ambitions to rest,” the hideous Margit says, rather arrogantly, as he gives you a good thrashing. Eventually you’ll put his foolish ambitions to rest, but for most of us, it took a few tries.

It’s a line that I can’t help thinking about as we discuss the upcoming Elden Ring feature film. The big news is that Bandai Namco is working with A24 on the project, and that director Alex Garland is attached to write and direct. According to the press release, “the project will be led by filmmaker Alex Garland (Ex Machina, Civil War, Warfare) as writer and director. The film will be produced by Peter Rice alongside Andrew Macdonald and Allon Reich from DNA, and George R. R. Martin and Vince Gerardis.”

(Any excuse for George R.R. Martin to work on something other than The Winds Of Winter!)

Garland is a talented director. I thought Ex Machina was brilliant, and Civil War was quite powerful. An Elden Ring adaptation feels a little outside Garland’s wheelhouse, but as far as directors go he seems like a solid choice. I might have gone with Robert Eggers, personally, but a Garland / A24 Elden Ring movie is a pretty compelling proposition. The only problem?

I just don’t get it. Why even make an Elden Ring live-action movie to begin with? Other than capitalizing on its popularity and maybe making a bunch of money, what is the point of a live-action version of this game? I’m not even opposed to video game adaptations, but this one in particular feels all wrong to me. I could see a series of mostly silent animated shorts working. Get a bunch of different animation studios to each do a different story in The Lands Between using different art-styles and whatnot. That would be cool.

But a live-action movie? For a game that has little to no dialogue, extremely cryptic lore, no actual immediate story? Sure, it’s steeped in backstory but the actual plot, in true Dark Souls fashion, is mostly “fight your way through terrifying areas, slay monstrous beasts, engage in some cryptic shenanigans and then prompt one of several opaque and bizarre endings to fulfill a really confusing destiny".

Could that make for a cool movie? I suppose so. Will it almost certainly be way, way less cool than the game? I can’t see how any film, no matter how talented the director and production team, no matter the size of the budget or the quality of the special effects, could really evoke what Elden Ring is able to through gameplay. The combat, the sense of discovery, the leveling up and finding awesome new loot, none of this will really translate to a film. They’re just such utterly different mediums.

Still, I’ll hope for the best and absolutely watch it when it comes out as will many countless others I’m sure. I’d almost prefer a Demon’s Souls movie, however. There’s a bit more linearity to that game. Boletaria might be an easier world to bring to life on film as well. Oh well. Just remember, dear reader: You have a heart of gold. Don’t let them take that from you.