Matt James and Rachael Kirkconnell's breakup: Their relationship timeline and why it ended
Matt James and Rachael Kirkconnell’s breakup in January 2025 marked the end of a four-year relationship that began on Season 25 of The Bachelor. This article highlights their relationship timeline and the reasons behind their split.

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- They were in an on-and-off relationship for almost four years.
- They officially parted ways in January 2025.
Full name | Matthew James | Rachael Kirkconnell |
Gender | Male | Female |
Date of birth | 5 December 1991 | 26 September 1996 |
Age | 33 years old (as of 2025) | 28 years old (as of 2025) |
Place of birth | Raleigh, North Carolina, USA | Georgia, United States |
Current residence | United States | United States |
Nationality | American | American |
Ethnicity | African-American | White |
Sexuality | Straight | Straight |
Religion | Christianity | Christianity |
Height in inches | 6'5'' | 5'5'' |
Height in centimetres | 196 | 165 |
Weight in pounds | 211 | 126 |
Weight in kilograms | 96 | 57 |
Hair colour | Black | Brown |
Eye colour | Dark brown | Brown |
Father | Manny James | Darell |
Mother | Patty | Kim Kirkconnell |
Siblings | Reece James | Trinity, Greyson |
Relationship status | Single | Single |
School | Sanderson High School (North Carolina) | West Forsyth High School |
University | Wake Forest University | Georgia College & State University |
Profession | TV personality, businessman, former NCAA football player | TV personality |
@rachaelkirkconnell | @mattjames919 |
Matt James and Rachael Kirkconnell first met on Season 25 of the reality TV show The Bachelor and quickly became one of the show's most talked-about couples. Though their relationship had ups and downs, they stayed together for nearly four years before officially breaking up in January 2025. Here is a detailed timeline of their relationship:

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Matt James first met Rachael Kirkconnell during the filming of The Bachelor Season 25. It was Matt’s first night as the franchise’s first Black Bachelor, and Rachael was one of the contestants vying for his heart.
In the fall of 2020, Matt James and Rachael Kirkconnell fell in love on The Bachelor. They had an early connection on the show, but their relationship deepened in Week 5 after their first one-on-one date. During the evening portion of the date, they both opened up about their feelings and admitted they were falling in love.
Rachael later shared her concerns about the show’s process, saying she was afraid she would not end up with Matt. She said:
I feel like I've been searching for what feels like my whole life for this, and now I feel like I finally found it. The only worry is that I just don't get you at the end of this.
In response, Matt comforted her, saying he often thought about her and that she always made him smile.
Where I'm at with you is, when I'm not around you, I'm thinking about you. And you just make me smile.

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As the show continued, Matt James met Rachael’s family during her hometown visit. Near the end of the season, Matt chose to send the other finalist, Michelle Young, home and told Rachael he would not propose just yet, but he did want to be with her. He said:
When I think about the life I want to live, I think about living that life with you. And I want to leave here with you. And I want to commit to you and to every day moving on, what we started here. And the truth is that I love you.
Matt gave her the final rose, and the two left The Bachelor as a couple.
In March 2021, Matt James announced his breakup with Rachael Kirkconnell during the After the Final Rose special. This decision followed the emergence of photos showing Kirkconnell at an antebellum-themed party in 2018, which sparked widespread controversy and discussions about racial insensitivity.

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James expressed that these revelations made him question their relationship. He told Rachael on the Bachelor Nation:
The most disappointing thing for me was having to explain to you why what I saw was problematic and why I was so upset...It was in the context of you not fully understanding my Blackness and what it means to be a Black man in America and what it would mean for our kids when I saw those things that were floating around the internet.
Though Rachael apologised and hoped to work things out, Matt felt they needed time apart for her to grow and reflect.
In April 2021, Matt James and Rachael Kirkconnell sparked reconciliation rumours after being spotted together multiple times in New York City and parts of California, just weeks after their public breakup.
On 28 April 2021, Matt confirmed to People that he and Rachael were exclusively working on their relationship, saying:
Not pursuing any relationships right now outside of that. I said I was going to focus on my relationship with her and that means focusing on it.

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On 6 May 2021, during an interview with WSJ Magazine, Matt confirmed that he and Rachael were dating, and he shared what they talked about when it came to fighting racism and being a good ally. He said:
I think the best way to put it is that we can have critical conversations about being in this relationship and what I need in a partner, especially if that woman isn’t Black, to understand what comes with me and my life and being Black. It’s on people who care about being allies to do the work to be truly antiracist, and I think it’s unfair to leave people without the ability to unlearn and be better.
In May 2021, Matt James publicly acknowledged that Rachael Kirkconnell had given him an ultimatum, which played a pivotal role in their decision to rekindle their relationship after a prior breakup.
However, their relationship remained unclear, with James reportedly maintaining contact with other women during this time. This lack of clarity led Kirkconnell to confront James, expressing that she needed a definitive commitment from him.
On 25 May 2021, during an appearance on the Pomp podcast, James said:
She was like, 'If you're going to make this work, let's do it. But, if you're not going to make it work, I'm going to let you do your own thing.
The TV personality added:
That's really all I needed. It was an ultimatum that I needed. It's been great. It was honestly a commitment that we made to each other that we were going to work on the relationship.

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In June 2021, Matt James took Rachael Kirkconnell to his hometown in North Carolina. During their visit, the couple enjoyed local experiences, including dining at James' favourite burger spot and attending a hockey game at Raleigh's PNC Arena.
In July 2021, Matt James and Rachael Kirkconnell made their red carpet debut as a couple at the ESPY Awards in New York City.
On 16 January 2025, Matt James announced his breakup with Rachael Kirkconnell in an Instagram post that featured a prayer. He also shared a photo from their first meeting on the show, writing:
On 16 January 2025, Matt James announced his breakup with Rachael Kirkconnell in a now-deleted Instagram post featuring a prayer, marking the end of their nearly four-year relationship. He included a photo of the first time he and Rachael met on the show, writing:
Father God, give Rachael and I strength to mend our broken hearts. Give us a peace about this decision to end our relationship that transcends worldly understanding. Shower our friends and family with kindness and love to comfort us. And remind us that our Joy comes from you, Lord

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The news of their break-up came a month after Kirkconnell paid tribute to James on Instagram in honour of his 33rd birthday.
Happiest of birthdays to my best friend, my teammate, my sous chef, the man that has my whole heart. You fill it (and my tummy) with so much love and laughter and i’m so thankful i get to dance through this life with you. thank you for your never ending love and support and smooches and snuggles. to many more adventures, happy birthday my pumpkin
On 29 January 2025, in a candid interview on the Call Her Daddy podcast, Rachael shared her feelings about the breakup, stating:
I’m still in total shock. I think that’s why I didn’t say anything. Still haven’t made a statement or anything because I’m processing this just like everyone else is.
She added:
He said that at the end of the day, there were just qualities about me that he worries about having in a wife... I feel like after four years, you should know or you should feel ready.

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Matt James and Rachael Kirkconnell, who began dating on The Bachelor Season 25, officially parted ways after nearly four years together. Their relationship faced ups and downs, including a brief breakup in 2021, before ending for good in January 2025.
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