“CHIPOLOPOLO PUMMELLED BY RUSSIAN TANKERS.”
Full-time Russia 5-0 Zambia
By Phillip Banda
It was a cold evening in Russia yesterday, the 24th of March 2024, and unfortunately, the only heat came from the boots of the Russian players, not the Chipolopolo. Zambia’s national team was battered 5-0 by a well-oiled Russian side that looked like they were playing FIFA on beginner mode, while the Zambians couldn’t even register a single shot on target.
Coach Avram Grant used the friendly to test combinations ahead of the World Cup qualifiers and AFCON, but instead of chemistry, we got confusion. Up front, Sabobo Banda and Kennedy Musonda were isolated like unpaid interns, while midfield duo Kings Kangwa and Clatous Chama looked like they were still searching for the Wi-Fi password.
To make matters worse, the Zambian defense opened up more gaps than a Lusaka pothole after rainy season, and the Russians happily drove their football tanks straight through.
There seemed to be no urgency, no structure, and at times, no idea. The Chipolopolo just knocked the ball around like they were playing keep-away — not realizing they were the ones being hunted.
With key players like Fashion Sakala still sitting at home polishing their boots in early retirement (forced or not), fans are beginning to wonder if Grant will tinker with this setup or stick with a game plan that clearly left his side out of ammo.
As one fan put it: “We didn’t just lose — we were spectators with front-row seats.”
And so, after nine years of the Kamanga administration, this is the “football development” we’ve been served — a team with no bite, no bullets, and no clue.
